Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Waiting

My soul, wait silently for God alone, 
for my expectation is from Him.  ~Psalm 62:5

I know that in the vast array of adoption stories, ours has moved quickly and predictably. Indeed, even more quickly than we had expected. So truly, I am grateful and I do not take this for granted.

But just the same, for the past four months I have had to endure an ocean between myself and this tiny baby who is meant to be mine. She is well cared for but the workers simply do not have the time needed to feed a cleft lip/palate baby who drinks slowly. At 8 months old, she weighs 11 pounds, and she is likely still hungry when the nanny must put her down and feed the next child. When I think of my baby daughter, fighting to thrive, yet going hungry, tears instantly spring to my eyes. She is also having hearing problems (a very common problem with cleft babies because of fluid build up) and likely needs tubes put in her ears. China does not do this procedure, so she must wait. And of course, she still needs surgery on her cleft palate as well.

Yet all of these physical concerns pale next to the most pressing reason Rosalie needs to be here with me: God created mothers uniquely to love and care for their children in a way that no other person can. There is simply no replacement. Indeed, God himself, the infinitely tender and compassionate comforter, compares the comfort He offers us with that a mother gives:

"As a mother comforts her child,
so will I comfort you."     
~Isaiah 66:13  

Can there be higher praise or greater validation of a mother's value and worth?

Joyfully I can say we are getting closer!  We will either travel Feb 14th or Feb 28th. We are waiting on two separate documents/approvals and the deadline for making the Feb 14th travel date is fast approaching. I am praying fervently that we will make it! And while it appears we are waiting on the Chinese government, I hold that it is ultimately the Lord we are waiting on. I do have a sense of peace that God's timing will prevail, but still, my heart will be restless until I hold Rosalie Faith in my arms. 


Thursday, January 3, 2013

Rosalie Faith

Caleb and I have shared a desire to adopt for many years now. We actively pursued it several years ago until it became clear that God was closing that door for us at that time. We put the dream away with plans to re-visit it after we had finished having biological children. But down deep I was never sure we would really do it. Life gets busy and tiring and I just didn't feel the passion for it that I once had.  

And then one day last March, my eyes were opened again to the possibility. A Facebook friend posted pictures of the daughter they were waiting to bring home from China. Something sparked in me: an overwhelming compassion for children without a mommy and daddy, a desire for more children in our family, a fresh understanding that I, myself, was lovingly adopted into God's family through Jesus' sacrifice on the cross. I brought the subject up with Caleb and he was surprised (it hadn't been mentioned between us for a LONG time), but open. We agreed to pray about it separately and within a couple of weeks had decided that yes, this is what our family was going to do.  

We had never been specifically interested in China. But at this place in time, China appeared to have the most stable process and to be the best match for us. We were able to meet with a couple who were waiting to bring home their second child from China and they were extremely pleased with Holt International's *Child of Promise program. Because of their encouragement and experiences, we decided to do the same.   

Within a month of adoption re-appearing on our radar screen we had signed papers to begin our adoption journey with Holt. My journal entry dated 4/22/12 (two weeks after we had officially begun the process):

"The dream has taken different shapes through the years - from the foster care system to various countries and now it's perfect form exists (because it is from you God): a little girl from China.  I can't help but believe that you have re-lit this fire at this time and directed us to this place because there is now being born, or soon will be, a little Chinese baby who was born to be a Williams.  Guide us to her, Lord, in your perfect plan."

My faith is greatly increased as I now realize that eight days before I wrote this, our precious daughter had been born in China. And five months later, after we had been logged in to China's system for only ONE day, we were matched with her. Obviously, the nudgings of the Holy Spirit and the whirlwind of getting the process moving had been for a very providential purpose. This little girl was born to be a Williams.  





*All adoption through China right now is special needs. The Child of Promise program is for children with minor correctable medical conditions. Our sweet love has a cleft lip and palate. This is a common condition to receive through this program.